Archive for October, 2009
Lost in translation….
The Hubby loves me. And he does his best to show it, honest he does. After 23 years of intense training, he’s learned to express his feelings. He realizes that I need to hear things like “I love you so much,” and “I find you irresistable.” It took some coaching (and by coaching, I mean that I literally had to tell him things like, “Honey, this would be a good time for you to say, That dress looks amazing on you.”) for it to become almost second-nature for him to dole out the loving affirmations. But even after all my patient guidance and all his diligent effort, it doesn’t always come out right…
Presented for your amusement, a list of things that The Hubby meant as compliments, but that somehow got lost in translation.
“I thought that maybe after I pay the mortage I could set aside some money for you to go get your hair done.” What he means is “Gee, I know you’ve been wanting to go to the salon, but you’re worried about spending the money. I’ll make sure to put it in next payperiod’s budget.” But of course, what I’m thinking is that if HE’S noticed that I haven’t been to the salon in a while, it must really be bad. Like, Bride of Frankenstein bad.
Today, I told him a story related to a baseball game, and I made the comment “…left field, or maybe it was right field. I don’t know which is which.” He listened to the rest of the story and said: “Since you’re a walking encyclopedia, you need to know something. If you’re at home plate, THIS (pointing with his left hand) is left field, and THIS (pointing with his right hand) is right field. It would be really embarrassing for you to know everything else and not know that.” See, what he meant it “I married me one smart cookie!” But what it came out as…well, notsomuch.
And my personal favorite: “Today I was sitting in church, before the service started, and I noticed how all the women had their perfect hair and their expensive shoes, and nice jewelry that matched their outfits, and I realized that I am so lucky that my wife isn’t as high maintenance as that.”
Yeah, that one kind of goes without explanation, doesn’t it?
It’s a good thing he’s a cute man….
Tags: affirmations, baseball, coaching, encyclopedia, hair, left field, right field, salon, The Hubby, training
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